Hot and Tight
by Dajypop
Summary: Chris never realized just how much of a pain in the ass his Mother Fucker outfit would be until his first real crime. Movieverse.


**Title:** Hot and Tight  
**Author:** Daisy  
**Fandom:** Kick-Ass 2  
**Setting:** On the ride home after the first Evil Crime  
**Pairing:** Javier/Chris D'Amico  
**Genre:** Humor/Romance  
**Rating:** T  
**Chapters:** 1/1  
**Word Count:** 978  
**Type of Work:** One-Shot, inspired by art by Yazoo-Jenova on Deviantart and a Kick-Ass 2 Interview with Chris Mintz  
**Status:** Complete  
**Warnings:** Leather, Mentions of boners, Strong language  
**Disclaimer:** I do not own Kick-Ass or any of the characters. I do, however, own the writing and plotline for this story.  
**Summary:** Chris never realized just how much of a pain in the ass his Mother Fucker outfit would be until his first real crime.

**AN:** So, I was going through my deviations on deviantart when I saw a particular picture that linked to an interview that talked about how hot the Motherfucker outfit is, and my mate told me just how bad that would be if you had a boner, as well. It took 30 minutes to get on and off, after all, so it would be a pain in the ass.

**Hot and Tight******

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It felt so _good_ to be bad, and he was relishing in every second of it. However, he was starting to feel the bliss wearing off and another kind of prickling feeling bubbled forth against his skin. The sweat was sticking to him, and he wiped at his face a little before finally pulling off the mask and tossing it to the back seat of the car. His face dripped with sweat, and he panted hotly as he tried to let some air into his skin.

"_Fuck_, Javier, it's fucking hot in this car. You should turn the damn heat down…" The complaint was easy enough, and he reached forward to grab a cold bottle of water from inside a minifridge in the back. Chugging the whole thing quickly enough, he still felt warmer than he should have been. Panting hotly, he tugged at the leather choker on his neck, managing to unsnap it from the back. Throwing that in the seat, as well, he grunted a little bit more before huffing.

"Chris, it isn't even on _hot_. It's blasting cold air back there, man. Are you sure you shouldn't just try and take that off?" Javier questioned, turning slightly to look at the other before cringing at how bedraggled the other looked.

"It took me half an hour to get it on in the first place!" The whine left him as he licked his lips, trying to pull at the corset hiding beneath his cape and finding it laced too tightly to truly get off right now. He'd had to fix it himself, snapping it together and that had taken too long, in and of itself.

"You should have thought about that before you decided on using it for everyday wear." The joke seemed lost, however, considering Chris leveled a glare at him and kicked the back of the seat. He finally managed to undo the top eight clasps and nearly pulled at his chest, desperate for his skin to breathe, now. "Man, imagine if you ever pop a boner in that thing."

"Shut _up_, Javier. Just… Pull over and help me get this off!" The demand was simple enough, but even as Javier followed his orders, pulling into a nearby alley and making sure they were hidden, he knew it wouldn't be easy. Nothing was _ever_ easy with Chris. He was a man who complicated things that _should_ have been simple, almost as though he thought on a more complex level and made everything too hard to comprehend. Not that anyone gave him that kind of credit. Once Javier made his way into the back seat, things got a little more difficult, as expected.

The snaps to get the rest of the outfit off were finally undone after a good five minutes of Javier patiently listening to 'you're pinching me' and 'ouch, Javier, be careful!', but it happened that those boots were nearly impossible. The straps connecting keeping them snug around the tight leather pants had more complicated buckles than any chastity belt could possibly boast, and suddenly he felt pretty bad for his charge. After all, he was wearing something like this when he had barely stepped out of being a virgin… Maybe he hadn't liked it?

Then again, the hardening lump that the boy now complained about taught him otherwise, and he scoffed slightly to try and keep focused on the task at hand. Hand to buckle, buckle removed, next buckle. That was his thought process at the moment, working through one leg and finally letting the boot slide off and fall to the floor of the car. That left the other boot and the rest of Chris' outfit before he was left in his underwear. That was, if he wore any, which would make the chafing happen less.

"Javier, can you just hurry _up_?" Chris finally spat, sniffing slightly and looking away, a dark blush on his face.

"Do you want this done right, or do you want me to accidentally hurt you some more?" Raising a brow, the Spanish man seemed to be getting close to the end of his rope, but he still persisted in pushing and pulling at the buckles on the other leg until the boot finally gave way and was discarded just as easily as the first.

A thin black line of fabric held Chris' stomach back, though it really wasn't necessary, and he began to pull at the tight leather pants that held his one-piece suit to his body. Once the sleeves were off, it came off easier, save for the sweat making it sticky and kind of gross. However, with that much left to do, it took only a few minutes before he was mostly nude and panting, swallowing down another bottle of Evian before finally speaking.

"Thanks, Javier…" He smiled a little, crawling over the leather of his suit and kissing the other's lips gently. "I guess it really _did_ suck to have a boner in that thing…" He murmured, crawling into his lap and grinding a little. Thankfully, the black silk boxers holding him back were still in place, or the elder would have jumped him right there.

"Chris… Behave. We can finish when we get home, alright?" Though he didn't want to agree, he wasn't given any choice, and he ended up sitting in the back alone, mostly naked, hard and wanton. The entire drive home was possibly the most difficult that Javier had ever had to deal with, because Chris wouldn't drop the fact that he wanted sex _now_.

When they finally got into the house, however, they didn't make it past the living room before the two were making out. Tonight, they would party and celebrate. Tomorrow, he had training to begin.

**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**

AN: Alright, well… I hope that was as much fun to read as it was to write. ^^ I loved it.


End file.
